Lame Duck Jokes

If you have any duck jokes please send them in via the contacts page so we can include them on this page.
We will even include your name next to your jokes.

What time do rubber ducks wake up?
At the quack of dawn!

What did the duck say when he went shopping?
Put it on my bill!

Where does a duck go when a duck gets sick?
The ducktors!

Where do you find a duck with no legs?
Where you left it!

What do you call a duck with fangs?
Count Duckcular!

What has webbed feet and fangs?
Count Quackula

Why don’t ducks fly upside down?
They don’t want to QUACK up!

Why do ducks have webbed feet?
To stamp out fires
So why do elephants have flat feet?
To stamp out burning ducks

A man and a duck are walking down the street together. Suddenly the man notices a low flying airplane coming right for them. So the man yells DUCK!!! And the duck yells back at the man with an angry face MAN!!!

 Countdown to the Beccles Duck Race 2007